Dear Abby: Widow, at 63, thought her life was over, but her body is giving her other signals

Greetings, Abby The second anniversary of my husband’s passing will arrive in a few days. We spent forty years together. His years weren’t easy; he struggled with a lot of mental and physical problems. I was alone because I didn’t want anyone to understand how much I had to deal with on a daily basis. For better or worse, as his wife, I had a strong affection for him.

Although it has been difficult, I thought I was handling things quite well. I believed my life was over at the age of sixty-three.

I’m not sure what my body is doing right now, but I’m feeling strong emotions that I thought had long since died.

After caring for my husband for so long, I neglected my beauty and weight. However, I’m trying to improve my appearance, I’ve shed a few pounds, and I’m eating healthily today. Why my body has decided to come back to life at this age is beyond me.

I don’t know how to approach older males because I reside in a rural location. After many years of loneliness, I believed that love and hope had died, but now I know that’s not the case. I’m very confused. My body doesn’t listen to me when I tell myself that I’m being ridiculous. This is a serious issue, so please don’t think I’m crazy. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. — A NEW DAY IN OKLAHOMA

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Abigail Van Buren

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DEAR REAWAKENED: You’ve gone through a challenging period. It is exhausting and frustrating to be a full-time caretaker. It’s not unexpected that you neglected to look after yourself after spending so many years tending to your ailing husband. You have a lot of life ahead of you now that the load has been removed.

The good news is that life is full of opportunities and far from over for someone who takes care of herself, which includes eating a healthy diet and exercising frequently. Your body is attempting to tell you this. Investigate activities that will allow you to meet new people and form friendships. You might run into someone and start dating again if you do.

Abigail Van Buren, better known as Jeanne Phillips, is the author of Dear Abby. Her mother, Pauline Phillips, began the company. For more information, visit www.DearAbby.com or send an email to P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.

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